Friday, June 22, 2012

The Irony of Bumper Stickers

The other day I was driving behind a small Honda Civic. I know, I know, where's the story going, Dave?

On the rear window the owner had one of those family stickers, you know the type, a mother, a father and a couple of kids holding hands. I wasn't really sure what type of family owned a Honda Civic, but I moved on to the next bumper sticker.

In white capital letters on a black background it read, "DON'T BE A DICK."

An interesting message for a family vehicle.

But I wonder, is this a preemptive "DON'T BE A DICK."? Is he telling me, "Dude, do not tailgate me, that's rude. I have a family." Because, I wasn't tailgating him. I was hanging back. Because I'm a good driver and I care about driver safety.

Was he maybe saying that I should treat my family and friends right? That I shouldn't hit my girlfriend? I just don't know what to believe.

I did, however, find it incredibly ironic that he (I'm just going to assume it was a dude at this point.) had one of those widened mufflers. The type that does very little actual muffling. To the point where you wonder, why did he pay for a muffler at all?

I'm pretty sure there isn't a single person whose driven behind a car with a muffler like that and hasn't thought, "Damn, this guy sure is a dick."

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