The Debate: Should you let your kid play Contact Football

There's an interesting debate making its way around the country--mainly in and through Sports Media circles. It poses a simple question (that doesn't have a simple answer): Should you let your child play football? (Specifically, the contact variety.) I've struggled with this question for awhile. Some of you may know that as of the writing of this here blog, I do not have a child, but I do have five years of high school football coaching experience. I know a little bit about this.

Football is not a sport for the weak, and I mean this in the least mean-spirited way possible. Football is a lot like marriage, it chews up people who don't really want to be there and spits them out, and quick. So to some degree, worrying about whether your kid should play football or not is a problem that sorts itself out. Moving forward with this piece, let's assume that every child of every parent has the potential to go on and successfully play high school football. (If you're worried about your child in college football or professional football, you should stop worrying. Get them through high school first.)

Let's talk about the reasons why a kid shouldn't play contact football first. List form style!

The Downsides of letting your child play football (not necessarily in order of importance):

1.) Injuries.
This is, after all, the primary worry of every parent. "I'm worried my kid will get a concussion." As a coach, let me tell you what I'm not worried about. Concussions. You see, concussions are one of the easiest injuries to heal, they just happen to hold the title of "hardest to recognize injury, like ever." The problem with concussions is that, at the highest levels of the sport, players and coaches still don't consider them a big deal. They take a hard hit and can't see straight for ten minutes and have a splitting headache and instead of taking a week off (which is how you heal a concussion), they beg to strap up and get back on the field, and they do this over and over again throughout their career (which is why we have the long term issues we have in regards to concussions.) At the lower levels of play this is not the case. On the high school football field kids are tested by trainers who aren't paid six figure salaries and will block the child from going back onto the field if they feel the kid has a concussion. As parents, your responsibility is to check and make sure after each practice and each game that your son (of maybe daughter, depending on badasstitude) doesn't have a concussion. I recommend every single parent of a football playing child get certified for concussions just like every coach has to be, you can do so here.

I am very aware of the long term threats of concussions, but let me tell you this. I was a four year varsity starter and did a bit of time on the college field, and continued to play multiple sports up until my most recent round of knee injuries. All told, that's over 20 years in competitive sports, with at least five of them in contact football. I never suffered a concussion. I had a coach who taught me how to hit, and placed emphasis on protecting my head.

I am all too aware of other things that football does cause. I have lingering knee injuries, lingering should injuries, over eating issues that stem from my habit forming years in high school. Now, are these things curable? Sure. I could have knee surgery, I ice my shoulder weekly and I could always hire a nutritionist and really get disciplined on eating better, healthier and more portion controlled meals. But the habits I formed came directly from what I experienced in football. Being a huge ol' fat dude was super useful on the football field, and is a super big pain in the ol' caboose as an adult.

Lastly, the biggest threats to your child's enjoyment of their life through football are injuries to joints. Such as ACL and MCL tears, etc. But to pretend that this isn't happening frequently in basketball, soccer and baseball is ludicrous. These days people are able to do things that the human body simply wasn't designed to do. Injuries happen when boundaries are pushed, and athletes live to push those boundaries.

2.) Football is an extremely violent sport.
It rewards anger, meanness and violence. Now, this completely belittles all of the good things it brings about in children such as teamwork, companionship, discipline, etc. But we'll get to those in a bit.

I don't buy into all this crap about football bringing about violence in people who aren't naturally violent and such. The very public issues that the NFL has recently had with domestic abuse have aired this issue for all to see, without really putting it in any context for the average person. I haven't been in a fight since I was in 10th grade. I've had no need for any form of violence other than the occasional loud argument. Most of my fellow teammates live quiet, happy lives. As with most things, the few make the majority look bad.

3.) Youth football does not prepare your child for higher level play.
This is where I come into the argument in full swing. Is youth football worth the risk? I wasn't able to play football until high school due to my size. (I was simply too big for Pop Warner and CYFL didn't exist yet.)

So here's the reality of youth football. The coach's kid gets the position he wants. Probably quarterback or running back. Maybe linebacker too. The slower kids, the ones who haven't bloomed yet, they play line. The speedsters play everywhere and do everything.

You see...youth football ignores one major thing that high school football doesn't: puberty. 

Chances are your 14 year old kid isn't going to look anything like he did at 11. It doesn't do much good to teach a kid about playing offensive line, for him to go and hit a growth spurt and all of a sudden be playing wide receiver because he's a 6 foot 5 beast with a 4.2 (second) forty yard dash and the ability to catch anything thrown at him. Wide Receiver and offensive Guard are such vastly different positions that they're barely the same sport. And yet, this happens all the time. As a freshman coach I was constantly bombarded with this line: "Coach, in Pop Warner/CYFL I played running back." Now you can insert any old position into the underlined portion but the problem with that oft-repeated line was this: that kid who played running back back in Pop Warner? Now he had a gut and hadn't showed up to summer work outs and hasn't had a meal that wasn't McDonald's in a month. That kid is going to be a lineman. Which may have led to some interesting conversations with Mom, but I always kept to my general rule, which was: if I can outrun you, you're a lineman. 

The point: your kid is going to change, a lot, right in front of your eyes. Youth football teaches them to play the position they are suited for in their youth. Which most likely will not be the same position they are suited for on a high school football team. So if you're really all that worried about youth football, hold them out, let them decide if they want to play football when they're in high school and are at least going through puberty. You get teamwork from youth basketball and baseball. (To be fair, one of my worst injuries ever came from playing little league baseball.)

The Upsides of letting your kid play football (definitely not in order of importance):

1.) Injuries.
Weird right? But injuries toughen a kid up. I broke or jammed every finger on both hands in my playing career. And you know what? When I get hurt now...I don't freak out. I understand pain and I understand my limits. I can calmly assess the situation and figure out what needs to be done. I'm not the toughest guy on the block, but I can hold my own. When I came into high school football I was a puffball-fruitloop. I cried in history class because I got a B once. No lie. I mean, I didn't deserve the B, she was mad at me for talking. That's not right.

2.) Football is an extremely violent sport.
Hmmm. Again with this. The reality is that life isn't always that pretty, and having your child be able to hold their own with the roughest and toughest kids that high school can throw at them is not a bad thing.

3.) Teamwork.
Every job asks about it. Everyone who has played misses it. That feeling of team goes a long way. I still remember the vast majority of players I played with from every single season I played. Those people are important to you, they make a difference. Football is a great chance for your child to be a part of something bigger than himself. That opportunity is not afforded to everyone. It is earned, and it is worth it. Eleven guys with one purpose, one focus. Get the touchdown, deny the touchdown. It's beautiful, almost poetic.

4.) Discipline
Earlier I talked about how I had a lack of discipline with eating, due to, in part, football. This is largely true. But I also became extremely disciplined in working out, doing my homework (for some kids the only reason they even bother with class is because without it, they can't play their chosen sport) and showing up on time. With my coaches, if you missed the beginning of practice, you missed the beginning of the game, even if you were the Team Captain.

5.) It's fun.
It's so fun. I'm not the kind of person who sits around reliving the Glory Days, but if you put me in a room with even one of my high school football teammates and BOOM. We'll be...well, reliving the Glory Days. And our team wasn't even that good! Football is just that fun. There is nothing like it. You work so hard, day in and day out and you get rewarded by getting to go play against people you don't know and put everything on the line with your friends beside you. I'll say it again: eleven guys with one purpose, all working towards a common goal. It's an amazing feeling, one that I can truly say I miss.

So, should you hold your kid from football? Maybe. In the end, you're the parent and the decision falls to you. I can tell you this, if your kid wants to play, like really wants to play, and you stop him from doing so, you're doing your kid a disservice on a few different levels. But holding a child back from youth football is not going to hurt their high school football potential.

The best thing you can do is make an informed decision, talk to your kid about it, and if they decide to play, go get certified on how to recognize a concussion. Here's the link again: https://nfhslearn.com/courses.

10 Reasons Why Michael Sam Coming Out Gay Shouldn't Be a Big Deal

1. He's pretty damn good.
The kid made SEC Defensive Player of the Year honors. Something that has garnered a First Round pick in the NFL Draft the past seven years running.

2. He's going to be Rich.
All of you, presumably not rich people, who hate that Michael Sam is going to be an NFL player--as these eight NFL insiders supposedly do, need to remember one important thing: If he gets drafted, he's going to be rich. He won't give a shit what you think.

3. He probably ain't the first.
According to various population demographics I've just looked up, the gay population is actually pretty high. Michael Sam is probably not the first gay guy in the NFL. He's just the first guy to tell everyone that he's gay heading into it. Is it the wisest thing to do? Probably not, considering that "MichaelSamisafaggot" is trending on twitter right now, I'm inclined to believe he's going to have it difficult--at least until people forget, which they will. Because people are dumb--Agent K taught me that. 

4. Money, money, money...
It's pretty good business for the NFL. Having an openly gay player is a great way to make inroads into a segment of viewers that they've never made significant headway with before. If you think they don't want the extra viewers, then you've never been a multi-billion dollar industry before.

5. Pro locker rooms are already weird.
This is coming from someone whose spent a lot of time in locker rooms...it's already intensely weird that everyone is naked in college and pro locker rooms--and everyone flirts. I don't know if pretending to be gay or being fake gay is a thing, but...it's a thing. We've seen it on TV shows before...with 'bros' as the central characters. "Gay chicken." I'll leave it at that. Locker rooms are weird places--I find it difficult to believe that an actual homosexual would make it in anyway weirder. Would a hetero-sexual male do that with every girl he saw? Not if he wanted to get a girlfriend ever...or stay out of jail.
 
6. His teammates probably aren't too worried.
Is anyone really worried about him hitting on his teammates? Has anyone seen a football player before? This guy is going to have money. His men are going to be GQ models.

7. He's going to know all the hottest girls.
Going with in the vain vein of number 5. Gay guys know all the best girls. His teammates will probably have to sign in on some kind of list to hang out with him. He can just post it on his locker. "I'll be at such and such at 10 PM tonight, Beyonce and her back up dancers will be in attendance--only accepting 10, the ladies love defensive players and beards. Must wear suit and tie."

8. A bunch of college kids supported him, grown-ups can too.
Michael Sam has been pretty open about this, and according to him--he came out last August, before the season was fully underway. It apparently didn't hurt the team, as they got all the way to the SEC Title Game before losing to the National Runner-Up Auburn Tigers--and then winning their Cotton Bowl struggle vs. the dominant defense of the Oklahoma State Cowboys, 41-31.

9. Jonathan Martin and Richie Incognito agree about this.
This particular drama cycle needs its very own post. I came back to writing the blog just after the Incognito/Martin circus arrived and then eventually packed up its tents and left town. I'll eventually write a post about this or submit an article to Yahoo Sports. But suffice it to say, if the supposed bully-ee and the bully-himself don't care about the kid being gay, then the average dude in the NFL probably won't either. (I keep saying "probably" so as to leave room for all the stupid that may happen.)


10. The NFL needs this to go well.
The NFL has had a rough year. The Hernandez murder(s). The allegations of an NFL team asking a player about his sexual orientation--a highly illegal practice...the bullying claims from Jonathan Martin and subsequent defense of Richie Incognito by his Dolphin teammates (which, one way or another is going to lead to changes in the NFL player-culture.) Essentially, the NFL can't be seen to handle this issue poorly. It's just another PR nightmare waiting in the wings.